Has anyone reading this been the subject of a vegetarian attack? It doesn't take place the same way you may expect a traditional attack. There are no guns fired and no punches thrown. No one gets stabbed in one of these vegetarian assaults. No, they just look for the nearest overweight person and scream at them about killing things with faces. These ridiculous, anti-bacon tactics will no longer be tolerated. It's time to put on your bacon t-shirts, gentlemen.
The guilt trip that vegetarians try to lay on us is verging on the ridiculous. Videos are constantly put out that feature the slaughter of poor, innocent animals. Do you know what those animals would do to you if you were put in a pen with them? They would kill you with their animal feet, teeth, and horns until you were dead.
Who really cares about cows, pigs, and chickens anyway? Would they be contributing to the world in any way except eating and pooping? All of the really cool animals in the world make their way by killing and eating the stupid, slow animals. It just so happens that humans are some of the coolest animals in the world, second only to the panther. If we, as a race, stopped eating animals then we would be kicked out of the Cool Animal Club in no time at all.
Have you noticed the advertisements these people put out? They brainwash skinny celebrities who live on a diet of soy and bran that meat is evil. These incredibly hot women then make ads for their vegetarian overlords that are far too unfair. They make you want to think that if you'd just put down that hamburger and eat some corn, that these women might give you a little extra attention. The fact of the matter is that women who look like that want dudes who look like them, or dudes who are stinking rich. Odds are good that you're neither, so have some bacon.
We have to support our meat-eating rights just as ardently as they support vegetarianism. We have to advertise our passion for pork in any way we can, and it starts with a bacon t-shirt. If you're wearing your bacon pride on your chest like a badge, the vegetarians will cower away like a slug from the sunshine. The time for bacon activism has finally arrived.
The guilt trip that vegetarians try to lay on us is verging on the ridiculous. Videos are constantly put out that feature the slaughter of poor, innocent animals. Do you know what those animals would do to you if you were put in a pen with them? They would kill you with their animal feet, teeth, and horns until you were dead.
Who really cares about cows, pigs, and chickens anyway? Would they be contributing to the world in any way except eating and pooping? All of the really cool animals in the world make their way by killing and eating the stupid, slow animals. It just so happens that humans are some of the coolest animals in the world, second only to the panther. If we, as a race, stopped eating animals then we would be kicked out of the Cool Animal Club in no time at all.
Have you noticed the advertisements these people put out? They brainwash skinny celebrities who live on a diet of soy and bran that meat is evil. These incredibly hot women then make ads for their vegetarian overlords that are far too unfair. They make you want to think that if you'd just put down that hamburger and eat some corn, that these women might give you a little extra attention. The fact of the matter is that women who look like that want dudes who look like them, or dudes who are stinking rich. Odds are good that you're neither, so have some bacon.
We have to support our meat-eating rights just as ardently as they support vegetarianism. We have to advertise our passion for pork in any way we can, and it starts with a bacon t-shirt. If you're wearing your bacon pride on your chest like a badge, the vegetarians will cower away like a slug from the sunshine. The time for bacon activism has finally arrived.
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